today was lakes first day at nursery and she loved it. she didn’t want to come home. I don’t know what that says about her home life but I’m glad she enjoyed her time there.
I dropped her off at 1pm today and collected her at 4 after having my brows done, obviously you have to be selfish with your time. As I was getting off the bus Lewis called to say he was up the road and he had finished a job so we got to collect Lake together. We walked in nursery and looked through the window as she was sat down with all the other children eating her dinner and I felt so proud. I only recall this proud feeling when I gave birth but seeing her there, grown and interacting with children and her having no idea that we could see her filled my heart and made my eyes well up. I was so glad Lewis got to share that with me and see what a incredible human we have.
I cannot lie this has been one hell of a journey and I’m no where close to half way but at times like this its nice to stop and appreciate what you have and how much you have achieved, to save for days when you feel like you have had enough and that you cant go on anymore.
Parenting is the hardest thing you will ever have to do but ill tell you a secret, its totally worth it.
tomorrow is Lakes first time at nursery. I don’t know how I feel about it, one side fills me with dread like any other mother but you hear all these horror stories. on the other side I know this will do her so much good. She is in the middle of what feels like terrible twos (aside from she is 19 months old) she’s hitting, and saying ‘smack’ when she is doing it so is aware of what it is but I cant seem to curb this. I feel like I have tried everything.
Lake is pushing so much right now from throwing tantrums to throwing toys. She boots off when you change her, she boots off when you put her to bed, she boots off getting dressed and surprisingly getting undressed. She screams at the cats and throws her dummy everywhere possible including down the number 54 bus at rush hour, that was the fun thing of today. sometimes its just hard to listen to that whinge voice where she doesn’t even know what she wants.
Don’t get me wrong I love being a parent, being her mom is the best thing in the world and she surprises me everyday with what she picks up she is just going to grow so much at nursery with the other toddlers. Her being a baby didn’t seem to last long.
I’m looking forward to seeing her bloom.
I’ve not blogged in what feels like forever and I really want to put more time and effort into what I’m writing. So I have started and the first move was to buy a laptop and buy a book on blogging and taking some tips from people who I follow on Instagram. All achieved today. god I’m getting good at this making a list and sticking to it stuff.
I downloaded a list app on my iPhone and when I’m lying in bed at night and I have a million things running around in my head that I’m trying not to forget, I make the list on my phone, look at it the next morning and then mark off what I’ve done when I’ve done it.
I shall be a boss mom.
I can do this.